brendan halpin

Several years back I was broke and working 4 jobs and extremely frustrated about how hard it was to get around on the MBTA. (I was literally trying to get from Community College to Downtown Crossing on the Orange Line, which should be a simple thing but never was.). Frustrated, I started a website challenging Massachusetts politicians to take the T.

Which got me on a panel on a local TV show with a former secretary of transportation and a guy from The Pioneer Institute, a pernicious bunch of losers who don’t believe in the public good. They were the pro- and anti- public transportation guys, and I was the regular Joe T rider. Before the show, these two guys talked cordially about things happening in their social circle. I could not be civil to the Pioneer Institute guy because he had the ear of our then-governor and his influence was making my already stressful work life even worse. But the former secretary of transportation had no such difficulty.

I wrote something snarky about this at the time that conveyed my anger but also made me look like an asshole. (Sadly, I have a real talent for this kind of writing.) But what I was trying to say was that the whole debate was a game to these guys. It didn’t affect them like it affected me. And if it did, they’d probably have a harder time making banal small talk with each other.

Which brings me to Peter Thiel. You know, the Bond villain who runs the surveillance company and owns J.D. Vance? The guy who’s obsessed with the apocalypse and the antichrist? Who moved his family to Argentina because he’s afraid of the plebes rising up in the US? Well, turns out Mr. Tech genius was holding some kind of conference for powerful people, and the agenda and attendees were visible in plain text by looking at the code for the website. Oops!. As The Nation puts it: Session titles include “Money (Does?) Buy Happiness,” “Bring Back Nuclear,” “Navigating WWIII,” “Battlefield Technologies,” and, somewhat randomly, “How’s Your Sex Life?” “Other talks include ‘Build-a-Cult,’ moderated by the founder of the Christian networking site Pray.com,” write Wired correspondents Dell Cameron and Yulia Almazova, “and ‘Build-a-Party,’ run by a former White House national security official.”

Yikes. So there are a lot of unsurprising names going to this thing: Ted Cruz, Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, Jared Kushner, Elon Musk, and Grover Norquist.

But also? Democrats Preet Bahara, Cory Booker, Robert Rubin, Jim O’Neill, Lisa Monaco, Margaret Hamburg, Atul Gawande, Wes Moore, and centrist podcaster and self-styled expert on what Democrats need to do to win Ezra Klein. (Also, weirdly: Joseph Gordon Leavitt?)

And a bunch of other corporate shitbirds as well as Epstein pal Steven Pinker.

About a year ago I wrote a thing about the ignorant, classist take that was going around that pro wrestling somehow explained the Trump presidency. It’s a good piece—you should read it.

Reading about Thiel’s little party, I started thinking about kayfabe again (for the uninitiated, that’s the wrestling-specific term for the show of wrestling—the characters, the feuds, the stories that make the matches more exciting. Actually it covers the matches too. It’s basically everything about wrestling that’s a performance. So, like, the whole thing.). And I realized that though I’d framed my snarky piece about the MBTA TV panel as being about civility, it was really about kayfabe—putting on a show for the marks.

Looking at Thiel’s list of attendees, I think I can be forgiven for concluding that much of American politics is kayfabe. Corey Booker is great at thundering on the mic in committee meetings for YouTube clips that the perpetually unkempt Meidas Touch guy will report breathlessly. But apparently Booker is just cutting promos like Macho Man Randy Savage. (Actually, he just wishes his mic game was as strong as Macho Man’s. But I digress.)

Ezra Klein will probably come out with some think piece about how Democrats need to embrace bigotry and Peter Thiel’s crazy eschatology in order to win in November, which is horrible, but even his assertion that he cares about Democrats winning is kayfabe. He’s fine either way!

With this many establishment Democrats going to bend the knee to an unhinged, power-mad personification of evil, I don’t see how the Democratic establishment can be mad at voters for thinking the game is rigged. To put it another way: if ostensible opponents Cruz and Booker are both working for Thiel (and, more broadly, the Epstein class), who’s working for us?

The thrust of those pieces about how wrestling explains Trump was “ha ha, the rubes love a good show, that’s why they fell for Trump.”

Except here’s an important thing to understand about wrestling: everyone is in on the joke. Wrestlers, broadcasters, refs, fans—we all understand perfectly well what’s going on. So perhaps people are more sophisticated at spotting bullshit when they see it than folks inside the beltway think, which could explain why even voters who hate the Republican party are not excited about the Democratic party.

We know what it’s like when people who are genial co-workers pretend to have vicious feuds and insult each other ruthlessly. We understand that Peter Thiel and his ilk are setting the agenda no matter which party controls government. Yes, there will be some non-trivial differences in how the parties govern. But the bottom line is that the interests of the Thiel/Epstein class are always going to take precedence over ours.

When all these people are hanging out together, when all our politicians are bending the knee to the same big money people, American politics is strictly kayfabe. And the sad thing is, it’s not even a good show.